A Choshi Primer. Or,"How I spent the last week sitting at my computer in post-production."

After pouring a ridiculous amount of man hours into this project, I am very, very proud to present to you "A Choshi Primer:"

Lyrics:

Japan… Hm. How do I describe it?

I got this!

Coming to you live from the island, little place we call Choshi City.

Call the presses, it’s about to get messy ‘cause this gaijin* 'bout to get witty!

Gonna lay it on the line, tell you about the time I been having, now the Japanese nitty-gritty.

Spitting out my rhymes, and all in good time to be teaching all the little grade-school kiddies.

Now I admit I’m not exactly proud to be a stranger in a strange new land,

But there’s more than enough to do and see here so I thought I’d show you first-hand.

So I’ll take you up to speed, baby I’ma take the lead, take my hand, let’s take a ride.

What’s this?  A building emanating manliness!  That’d be my place, meet you inside.

And in the genkan* we have shoehorns and flip-flops for you,

But it’s not all different, look, I got a man-cave too!

And you can crash here on my sweet comfy Japanese couch if you’d like,

Or I’ll show you around, we can tour the town on my little red bike.

First stop, just upstairs, they’re getting kind of steep so leave the bike there.

That’s Matt.  I’m telling you he’s one cool cat. “Insanely gorgeous boy, love the hair!”

My main man Jesse, Canadian-born, three long years taking Choshi by storm.

That face?  We practically own this place, staying out all night making that ching-ching MONEY!

And every day I wake up praising the real J-E-T

“A collaborational, multi-national, educational entity!”

And I implore you now to live life vicariously through my eyes.

Or hey, just visit me, I’m starting to miss you American guys.

Sliding doors, tatami floors, cute sushi bars, and tiny cars!

My little fridge, weird-looking lightswitch, this walk-in shower has cleaning power!

What’s a dryer? We hang our clothes.  Bright pink undies?  Now everyone knows!

U.S. dollars? Forget you then.  Here, we rolling in Y-E-N!

And all you see here can be yours for the low, low price of a plane ticket.  Fly in,

Meet you at the airport, take you downtown, show you round the city with your eyes wide, sighing.

Singing karaoke with your best friends, screaming all the lyrics in a drunken glory.

Here in the conbini*, I’m a celebrity.  When I walk in, they all scream “irrashaimase!!”*

This place a gaijin* town, I’m teaching English now.

Ganbare Nihon, kanpai.*

*Translations:

Gaijin = foreigner, outsider; non-Japanese person in Japan.

Genkan = entryway, typically where you’d take your shoes off and leave them until you go out.

Conbini = Japanese word for convenience store, abbreviated from English into a single word.

Irrashaimase = “Welcome!”  Can be heard resonating through any store you enter, or even at the gas station as you drive in.

Ganbare Nihon = Basically, "Hang in there, Japan!" or "Go for it, Japan!"

Kanpai = “Cheers!”  Said when drinking/toasting at parties and other social events.